It's not me

It was a moment that defied all words, a moment when I felt something inside me fall asleep, and something else wake up.

When I began this I didn't have a plan, other than that to chronicle my life under the new administration; there'd be an emphasis on small-scale micro-communalism initiatives, as well as more personal insights and responses to current domestic political affairs. But I don't have a PLAN for making it engaging or interest-sustaining. I'm just kinda bashing it out and hoping that it makes sense. Somehow. It'll come later, right? I'll be able to pull the various threads together and weave a greater coherent whole... right?

I need to live on my own at the moment but I'm surprised by how lonely I am. Layla is not really a good companion; she's too young right now but I s'pose it'll come in time. The first action plan has to be to establish more closer ties with the immediate neighbours. Benign effortless socialising takes effort to pull off; it's not going to happen without a person or persons to lead the work.


Chasing solace of an evening..rest runs and hides and lives in a small yellow packet with an elephant printed on it..tonight the drug will take take take taken me past midnight but ditch me in the small hours groaning, sobbing and sucking on a bottle of whiskey.